In my journey in life to become a SHRINKING FAT CHICK, I have encountered so many obstacles that have made me either scream “I can’t take it anymore! Where is the pizza!” or “I don’t need the pizza. I’ll have a carrot instead.” I know, a carrot for a pizza is not realistic but I am trying to make the point that sometimes dieting is easy and sometimes dieting is the hardest thing to do in the world.
I sometimes wonder why some people are “graced” with being overweight and some are not. It can’t be all related to food and how much people eat because I know some heavy people that really don’t eat much at all and I know some Skinny Minnie’s who eat like horses! So, what is it? What is the determining factor? Are we put into a lottery at birth? Or maybe God (or whoever you believe in) sits with a big top hat with our names in it and draws names to determine who will be overweight and who will not? Does it have something to do with a past life? Maybe Karma? I just don’t understand at all and I really want to. I want to know WHY ME? Now, I have come to terms with my weight. I am what I am and if you don’t like it, screw you! But just because I have come to terms with it doesn’t mean that I like it, it just means that I have accepted that this is who I am right now. Can it change? Yes, but you can’t live your life looking to what could be, you have to live in the here and now and here and now, I’m FAT! (That’s right, I called myself fat!) What I want to know is why was it decided that I would have to be fat? Why couldn’t I be one of those girls that is 5ft 8in tall, perfect body and hair, and can eat any and everything she wants to without gaining an ounce? Why did it have to be me to have to deal with all of the crap that goes along with being overweight through my childhood, teen years and adulthood? There are times when I feel like there is this whole part of life that I have missed out on because of my weight, some by my choice and some not. How would my life had been different if I had been a size 8 rather than 24+? Who knows but sometimes I can’t help but wonder. One thing I do know is that I wouldn’t have so many purses and I would have a heck of a lot more clothes!
As weird as this may sound, sometimes the idea of really loosing weight scares me. I have been overweight as far back as I can remember, sometimes heavier than other times but always heavy. They say that the biggest fear that a person can have is the fear of the unknown – well, this is my unknown. I don’t know what it is like to be thin. I want to know, trust me, but it may make me a raging lunatic or a tramp or an idiot or who knows what. I’ve seen it happen in friends who have lost a lot of weight. They loose their mind and become a different person. They don’t see it but everyone around them does. I like the person that I am now so I don’t want to loose that but I want being thin to no longer be my unknown!
So, how do I make it happen? Where is the magic pill that I can take to make me not want to eat anymore? What is the magic workout that is easy and fun? Where is the magic elixir that I can drink to make all of the fat melt away? There is always surgery but do I really want to take that route. Heck, surgery is a whole other blog. How do I make it easier than it is now? I don’t know and I don’t think anyone else knows either. I have often heard that people loose the weight when they are ready to loose the weight. I feel like I am ready so why isn’t the weight coming off? What have I been doing wrong? I’ll probably never know but I do know this – I want to loose this weight and I will not given up on loosing it because when I give up, the weight has won and that is a defeat that I just can’t accept so I am putting on my armor and preparing for the battle of a lifetime or maybe I should say the battle for my life.

I was talking to someone at work recently about being “heavy” and we somehow got onto the various different terms that are used to describe someone that is overweight – Fat, heavy, Overweight, big, obese……. MORBIDLY OBESE….. I have heard this term over and over again but for some reason it really bothered me. Obese sounds bad enough but to add MORBIDLY to it is like saying “not only are you fat but YOU GONNA DIE!” Now, I completely understand that being overweight has its health risks, (They don’t call me THE FAT CHICK for nothing, ya’ know.) but is it really necessary to call us DEADLY FAT? That is a literal translation! We live in an intelligent society so I am sure that we could come up with better terms than Morbidly Obese – wait a minute, nevermind. This is the same society that has young girls and women believing that the only way to be beautiful is to be 5ft 10in , 105 lbs, blonde hair and blue eyed. Now that is a crock of crap if I ever heard one! I think we (and by we I mean us MORBIDLY OBESE) should come up with some alternative terms to use to refer to ourselves. Who better to come up with these terms? Some 5’10”, blonde haired, blue eyed, 115 lb model type – I THINK NOT!!

I am just fine with Fat but I know that some are not and that is OK. So, what shall we call ourselves? How about FLUFFY? We aren’t fat, we’re fluffy! That could be fun!
What about Plump? I’ve used that in the past and I like it. Maybe overstuffed? Like an overstuffed teddy bear. I am sure that there are many, many more terms that we can use to describe us

There are so many other terms that sound so much better…. Like Voluptuous (look at the definition to that one - http://dictionary.reference.com/search?r=2&q=voluptuous ) or Zaftig (http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/zaftig ). These are great examples of some wonderful ways to refer to an “overweight” woman!

I was exchanging emails with a new SP (SparkPeople) “Done Sistah” and we had an interesting exchange. I have always felt this way but had not had anyone share my “twisted” view. I am sure that we can’t be the only ones….. and if we are, it is time to open some eyes to The Fat Chick’s way of thinking!

I’ve noticed that sometimes people will refer to me as “overweight” and not “fat” as though “fat” is a dirty word. Like calling me fat is going to cause me to run to my room, slam my door and cry myself to sleep but saying I’m overweight will make me giggle with glee!
Or, better yet, like I don’t realize I’m fat. Can you see it: having dinner with a friend and they make a reference to my being “overweight” and me having a total and complete meltdown because of it! “What are you saying? Overweight? What do you mean by that? You don’t mean that I am….. I don’t know if I can bring myself to say it…. FAT!? How can you say that? I may be a little chubby but that is not FAT! If that is how you see me, well, I don’t think I can be around you! Goodbye!” and storm out of the restaurant crying with my dessert in hand! (I’m an emotional eater!!)
And why should Suzy SkinnyPants get all defensive when I refer to myself as fat? I know what I am and I don’t need anyone else defending me for it, especially someone who needs to have a double cheeseburger, 4 slices of pizza and a milkshake shoved down their throat! And then they say the most ridiculous thing…. Are you ready for it?? “You aren’t fat, you’re overweight.” WHAT IS THE DIFFERENCE? Fat is overweight, overweight is fat! Let’s see what the dictionary has to say, shall we??

According to dictionary.com:
Fat: having too much flabby tissue; corpulent; obese.

Overweight: weighing too much or more than is considered normal, proper, etc.

Now, call me crazy but those 2 definitions seem to be very similar (Well, the Overweight one is a little special but I will get into that in just a few) so why do thin/skinny/underweight people feel like it is a bad thing to let someone call themselves fat? Seems to me that if I want to call myself fat, heffer, or even Tubo the Wonder Whale, that is my right!

Now, onto the definition of OVERWEIGHT….. OVERweight, UNDERweight….. What is this WEIGHT? What is NORMAL or PROPER? And who was made judge and jury of that determination? Was there an election somewhere that I wasn’t told about? I want in on that – Let me decide!! You can look on the internet and probably find 20 different definitions for what is a “normal” weight, so which one is right? You can bet that all of them were decided on by some male doctor who is probably 10-20 lbs overweight so I guess his judgment is a bit impaired! We live in a society that has women believing that Kate Moss is a NORMAL weight and if you don’t look like Angelina Jolie, you just aren’t beautiful. Well, I beg to differ. In my new adventures in SparkVille, I have come across so many amazingly beautiful women, both inside and out! Women who are supportive of each other and make a true effort to lift each other up instead of tear each other down. In my most humble opinion, that is truly beautiful.